Author Archive: ayoola

2015 Leave Behinds

There have been two major losses which have significantly, not only changed how I live my life, but have also changed how I view the world. The first loss was someone I loved soooooo very much. The second one was someone I didn’t know at all. Those two losses were beyond my control, nothing I …

Continue reading

Joy and Pain

“Remember when you first found love how you felt so good Kind that last forever more so you thought it would Suddenly the things you see got you hurt so bad How come the things that make us happy make us sad”   Not unlike most people, as 2015 comes to a close, I reflect …

Continue reading

Highland ICU

As I returned to the waiting area to give an update, again, I was trying to figure out, how to convey, that which I, was yet to fully comprehend; 17 gunshots wounds, 3 guns, 3 shooters; Vin’s repeated account of the black truck, the man with the hoodie and the AK. He would repeat those 3 details …

Continue reading

Tirade Tuesday…this one’s for you Courtaney!

I have taught high school for a total of 8 years in 4 districts. I have never taught in a comprehensive, traditional high school. In fact, not only have I taught in alternative schools in the community, for kids who have been expelled from their districts, I have taught in Juvenile Detention Facilities. I have …

Continue reading

From Children’s Hospital to Highland Hospital

I returned to the lobby to give everyone an update on how Vinnie was doing and what was going to happen next. He was being transferred to Highland Hospital at 7 am. It all continues to be surreal to me, at this point. Even now, looking back, thinking back, recalling details, and remembering details I …

Continue reading

The Expectation of Loss

I remember 12 1/2 years ago I got an early morning phone call from a friend telling me his mom had passed away.  She had been diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer the previous summer and it had been a grueling 6 months from diagnosis to treatment to “keeping her comfortable” to her passing.  Although we lived …

Continue reading

The Who and Why of It

A friend suggested that I write an introductory blog to let people know who I am and tell the purpose of my blog. Deciding to blog about my life, my experiences, my pain, my joy, my life was not a difficult decision to me. It is talking about who I am that is difficult and …

Continue reading

Children’s Hospital

I am standing in front of the security desk. I am calm. I am clear. I have not shed one tear. I am focused. I am wondering where Var is, why isn’t he here, he was closer, he should have been here by now. “I’m here to see my son, Vinnie Valentine. He’s been shot.” …

Continue reading

The Night of The Shooting

On January 30, 2009, my life, our lives, forever changed when my oldest son was shot.  This story is complex, in so many ways. I can not tell the story without the context in which it occurred. My son and I were both working full time at our church. I was also working part time …

Continue reading

Writing Saves Me

For a long while I have known I needed to write to keep my sanity, to keep me from being sucked into the black hole. I love to express my thoughts, feelings, and sometimes even my opinions through my writing. I recognize it is a gift I have been blessed with. I refrain from being judgmental …

Continue reading